tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28676746.post4998921768620569995..comments2023-06-19T06:08:16.813-07:00Comments on Kucing Belang: Beauty, Brains and Expectationsadibah abdullahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10922499155555745243noreply@blogger.comBlogger5125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28676746.post-18569014032623039662008-06-25T22:16:00.000-07:002008-06-25T22:16:00.000-07:00to taufik, i'm attracted to rooney..how does that ...to taufik, i'm attracted to rooney..how does that sound? bad taste? <BR/><BR/>adibah,<BR/><BR/>look is one thing. research told us that better-looking people are favoured, in job markets even. but when it comes to me - yes, beauty does play a part, but upon maturing, even the most handsome boy in my class did not seem attractive enough, given the way he conducts himself. after a few weeks he didn't seem handsome at all. <BR/><BR/>the key is self-confidence i think. the mechanism is like this :you dress up a little bit (that's one of the best bits about being a girl i have to say), put a light make up maybe and feel confident because you feel you are at best (according to your own standard hopefully)- that helps i think in making you feel beautiful. the 'dress for success' mantra is an 'internal' matter, it is how it affects you, not others. <BR/><BR/>I am not a gay of course, but some of my girl friends are attractive i have to say! it is the way they present themselves, with so much confidence that makes them beautiful. <BR/><BR/>p.s. on the dressing bit, i guess children upbringing affects as well. I rarely wear mismatch tudung and dresses partly because both my parents are particular about what we wear - e.g. a black tudung is a no-no, my father said i look so much older in black tudung. that makes me feel bad when i have to wear one. how's that?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28676746.post-37457592625774790202008-06-12T13:50:00.000-07:002008-06-12T13:50:00.000-07:00Opps.. that last post was mine.-Ahmad Zulhimi Isma...Opps.. that last post was mine.<BR/><BR/>-Ahmad Zulhimi Ismail-Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28676746.post-1807300896416601312008-06-12T13:49:00.000-07:002008-06-12T13:49:00.000-07:00Hahaha..... this post is crazy. Of course people w...Hahaha..... this post is crazy. Of course people want both looks and brains. It's natural. But then again, being too gorgeous is not really good. I know quite a number of gorgeous people who just becoz of their looks, invite unwanted attention. Some even bitch around about it while for the others, it feels really uncomfortable. I absolutely don't like it. If I had a choice to modify my looks and brains, I'd go for 60 pc looks and 80pc brains. But choosing a partner would be another matter though. Oh yeah, I remember a couple of months ago Yahoo! posted a research article that women whose husbands are "one level" less good-looking than them are happier. I don't know what "one level less good looking" means but I guess it's kinda true. <BR/><BR/>-Lepas ni kene laa aku cari bini yg cun, hehe :p -Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28676746.post-29621783357288224662008-06-11T09:50:00.000-07:002008-06-11T09:50:00.000-07:00The only cure is Taqwa.The only cure is Taqwa.Taufikhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01182387469199494762noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-28676746.post-21056833483935798802008-06-11T09:40:00.000-07:002008-06-11T09:40:00.000-07:00That sounds like a 'stright path' towards infatuat...That sounds like a 'stright path' towards infatuation. geez... <BR/><BR/>I think everyone is attracted by (physical) beauty, those who deny it are being hypocrites. People go gaga over Christiano Ronaldo or Rafael Nadal (fine, if you're not one, whatever your niche is doesn't matter). The only question left is what do you do with your ‘brain mailfunctioness’?<BR/><BR/>So, some review of the principals of metaphorical love:-<BR/><BR/>The First Principle<BR/><BR/>In metaphorical love, the physical and external beauty of a man or woman is known as husn. It is husn that generates passion in youth. There is no greater influence in the material world than husn; it causes even highly intelligent people to act irrationally.<BR/><BR/>The Seventh Principle<BR/><BR/>The truth is that no face is as attractive as it seems from a distance. No voice is as enchanting as it seems from afar. Is then the reality of physical attraction based on distance? If so, it would seem that it is better to keep a distance. <BR/><BR/>(http://red-sulphur.org/?q=node/274)<BR/>----------------------------------<BR/><BR/>I think it's no-brainer, usually those 'eye-candies' that you spot on the street, in your classroom, on the tv, etcetera seems to have the physical beauty appeal to you. But those 'beautiful' people who are your friends don't hold such admiration in your eyes because you know them more than skin deep. If they are beautiful 'inside' too, then that is another story: Your initial admiration for his/her beauty will turn into something more than that - I presume.<BR/><BR/>So I think beauty is not the only criterion for most intelligent enough people. Having said that, you see all those dramas about some Dato' dah tuee dah, but they still succumb to the heart that leaps (cari bini kedua yang cantik dan muda. kuang3). I can assure you that there are true stories like that out there… pretty scary... So you can’t take beauty out of the equation altogether – even for the intelligent ones.<BR/><BR/>I think the West has such a messed up society. With everyone flaundering their 'beauty' and dress to kill (espeically this summer. Really, 'killing' your spiritual well-being. hehe..), you can't put the physical beauty factor out of the equation, can you? They say you marry a trophy wife if you just look for her beauty. hihi.. Not to mention courtship is all about flirting and flaundering, it's about discharging your sexual energy. <BR/><BR/>So I think the society (the environment) plays a big role in deciding the ?% beauty ?% brain etcetera, not just on individual basis. Just imagine someone living in the Prophetic society or during the time of salafus soleh, what criteria will they choose (almost by default)? Compare it with the current West society; you will get a very different % distribution of those things. It depends on what is hip: celebrities or ‘ulama, flashy colorful and fashionable clothes or zuhud clothes, extravagant lifestyle or simple lifestyle, etc. It’s about social conditioning. <BR/><BR/>These are natural tendencies: Your ‘dreamy’ future husband/wife will naturally be someone pious if you are in a society that put stress on piety. If a society puts premium on the ‘dunya factors’ then your dreamy husband/wife will be someone who goes to party, who is handsome/beautiful, who plays the guitar, etc. Plus courtship is about dating, flirting, floundering, or something more traditional. The social conditioning effects are not something that you realize, they work rather subtly and you’ll be amazed yourself when you realize it has done its work on you. That’s the whole point of Hollywood etcetera.<BR/><BR/>So my contention is love of physical beauty is fitra but the % of beauty/brain/etc depends on the social construct.Taufikhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01182387469199494762noreply@blogger.com